Could you survive an aircraft emergency? This is why you put the tray table up.

Straighten up and fly right

ALL the rules and procedures about flying on planes can make the journey a real drag. Buckle this, stow that, turn that off. Are all these regulations just to intimidate passengers and make aircrew feel important?

Paul (not his real name) flew as cabin crew with a major Australian carrier for more than a decade. I asked him about some of the rigmarole that most of us ignore.

Brace! 

"Always good for a giggle, but if things get messy, you should know how to do it properly. The idea is to get you sitting as far forward as possible so if there's an impact you don't go flying all over the place. If we tell you to remove your tie, dentures and spectacles, then it's serious." 

Stow your tray table, seat backs upright. 

"It's a drag I know, but there are two reasons. One, to give you clear access if you have to move quickly and, two, to remove hazards in the event of a sudden stop. Also, you could slide under your belt if your chair is reclined."

Lifejackets are under your seat. 

"Seriously, make sure you know where it is and how to put it on-and whatever you do, don't inflate it until after you exit the aircraft. Remember Ethiopian Airlines Flight 961. Scores of passengers drowned when the cockpit filled with water and they couldn't swim out.

What's the secret to a silky smooth landing? 

Greg is a captain with a major Asian airline, with 15,000 hours' total flying time, and has held a commercial pilot's licence for 30 years. 

"The best landings are really in the hands of the pilot and 99 per cent of landings are done that way-good and bad. The best landings are when all the ducks are lined up (approach speed, no crosswind, glide slope etc) and you just nail it." 

And the rough ones? "Well, you'll expect me to say this, but it's most likely a computer system mistake where the 'autoland' feature has not properly selected the flare point for any number of reasons. If there's a bad crosswind, storm or it's gusty, a pilot will want to get the plane down ASAP and that can be indelicate."

Ray (not his real name) is a senior certifying engineer with 20 years' experience and signs off the big Boeing and Airbus aircraft. 

Turn off your mobile phone. 

"That's a myth, but most airlines, I reckon, keep mobile phones off for passenger comfort and it's still against the law in most places. Thankfully, most phones won't work at altitude anyway." Airlines are trialling in-flight equipment and 'picocells '- mini mobile phone towers inside the aircraft that communicate with land or satellite systems.

Where is the safest section of a plane? 

"Most survivors seem to be in the back." True. Despite claims by many authorities suggesting no "safe zone" existed, Popular Mechanics magazine analysed 20 accidents in the US and found passengers sitting rear of the wing had a noticeably improved survival rate.

Can a crazy passenger open an exit door mid-flight?

"There's a long technical explanation for this but, put simply, no. Aircraft doors are designed to withstand the pressure difference between the inside and outside of the plane, which increases exponentially with altitude. So, the combination of pressure difference, door design, locking mechanisms, air pressure and flow, and regulatory requirements makes it impossible to open aircraft doors during flight."

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